Partner Betrayal Trauma®

Partner Betrayal Trauma®

The discovery of a partner’s infidelity (emotional and/or physical) , pornography addiction or intimacy avoidance issues is one of the most devastating experiences that can occur within a relationship. When trust is given and broken the result is called Partner Betrayal Trauma.  The betrayal often shatters the foundation of the relationship, leaving you questioning your self-worth and ultimately the very authenticity of the relationship. It isn’t uncommon to find yourself struggling with powerful emotions like hopelessness, devastation, anger, sorrow, shame and grief after the discovery of a betrayal.  I help partners recover and rebuild their own sense of worth, confidence and self-esteem from this place of brokenness.  Because betrayal often causes the betrayed to question their grasp on what was “real” and what was “fake” I help my clients come to terms with the reality of this betrayal on all the impacted areas of their lives.

“I will guide you through your own unique journey of recovery and healing from betrayal so that you can ultimately make decisions from a place of strength and confidence rather than fear and insecurity. I coach my clients with compassion that comes from personal experience in addition to an educational focus on healing, recovery and relational wellness.” - Leslie

Processing complex emotions like shame, fear and anger in a productive cathartic manner.

Rebuilding Self-esteem and overcoming insecurities that can be triggered when betrayal occurs.

Learning how to express your own needs, wants and desires in a relationally healthy way.

Partner Betrayal Trauma can have profoundly devastating impact across all aspects of a person’s life – emotional, spiritual, social, physical, sexual and financial. The deep sense of being violated, loss of trust, and shattered self-worth radiates out from the relationship itself. Emotionally, you might feel consumed by grief, anger, anxiety and shame. Spiritually beliefs about love and commitment are not only challenged but possibly upended entirely. Socially, the betrayal brings isolation as friendships are strained and you might even feel stigmatized within your community of friends and family. Physically and sexually the trauma symptoms might include sleep disturbances, appetite changes and loss of desire to engage in activities that once brought you joy. Financially you might be dealing with separation or divorce which can possibly cause significant fear, anxiety and insecurity in  the present as well as the future. Betrayal leaves a wake of destabilization that touches virtually every aspect of your life.  Three of the areas I will coach and encourage you in are:

  • Rebuilding self-worth from the inside out through affirmations, prioritizing self-care, and focusing on positive qualities outside the betrayal.
  • Establishing a strong social support system of empathetic family and friends who can listen without judgement and provide encouragement during the recovery journey. If you join one of my Partner Recovery Workgroups you will be surrounded by the support of other women who have experienced something similar to you. You will know, perhaps for the first time, that you are not alone in this journey.
  • Explore in a safe space the complex emotional turmoil that you have experienced in all of the areas of your life: emotional, physical, spiritual, social, sexual and financial.
Partner Betrayal Trauma can have profoundly devastating impact across all aspects of a person’s life – emotional, spiritual, social, physical, sexual and financial. The deeps sense of being violated, loss of trust, and shattered self-worth radiates out from the relationship itself. Emotionally, you might feel consumed by grief, anger, anxiety and shame. Spiritually beliefs about love and commitment are not only challenged but possibly upended entirely. Socially, the betrayal brings isolation as friendships are strained and you might even feel stigmatized within your community of friends and family. Physically and sexually the trauma symptoms might include sleep disturbances, appetite changes and loss of desire to engage in activities that once brought you joy. Financially you might be dealing with separation or divorce which can possibly cause significant fear, anxiety and insecurity in  the present as well as the future. Betrayal leaves a wake of destabilization that touches virtually every aspect of your life.  Three of the areas I will coach and encourage you in are:
  • Rebuilding self-worth from the inside out through affirmations, prioritizing self-care, and focusing on positive qualities outside the betrayal.
  • Establishing a strong social support system of empathetic family and friends who can listen without judgement and provide encouragement during the recovery journey. If you join one of my Partner Recovery Workgroups you will be surrounded by the support of other women who have experienced something similar to you. You will know, perhaps for the first time, that you are not alone in this journey.
  • Explore in a safe space the complex emotional turmoil that you have experienced in all of the areas of your life: emotional, physical, spiritual, social, sexual and financial.
Recovering from betrayal is a journey without shortcuts. It will require commitment, focus and hard work. Some of the various areas we will work on together include learning about: sexual addiction (if it is present), how to identify your unique triggers, and how to communicate your boundaries in a healthy and effective way.  I will support, comfort and encourage you along the way to making the courageous choice of whether to rebuild the relationship or move on. If your choice is to rebuild then we will get to work learning how to re-build trust, intimacy and respect. Recovery takes time, consistency and transparency… which also happen to be the foundational building blocks of trust. An integral part of  Partner Betrayal Trauma recovery we are learning how to trust ourselves again. In my experience there are many ways to achieve this goal. Three of the most effective are:
  • Learning how to recognize and name what we are feeling through deep introspection work through journaling…written or audio.
  • Reading recovery materials to gain knowledge and understanding about any addictions that might be present and/or about any dysfunctional patterns of behavior of our own that are no-longer beneficial or relationally healthy.
  • Skills building and learning new tools of communication so that we can express ourselves in more effective ways. This will include learning to recognize our own triggers…where they came from and how to deal with them when they come.

If roughly 13 million adults suffer from some form of sexual/pornography addiction that inevitably leaves an equal number of partners suffering as well. Now consider the number of couples that have experienced either physical or emotional infidelity. Add those two numbers together and that is how many men and women might be experiencing the devastating impact of Partner Betrayal Trauma in virtually all aspects of their lives right now. It is the kind of betrayal that will change your life in an instant. Each of my clients have had their own unique experience of betrayal. I guide, coach, encourage and support my clients as they travel their unique path of recovery from Partner Betrayal Trauma. I can promise you this… there is a beautiful life in recovery waiting for you.

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